she's crying.

When they're fighting and there is nothing you can do about it. You feel helpless and sometimes you just want it to stop so you imagine things like, you are not there; you're inside a bubble and you keep telling yourself that everything will be okay when you know its not. 

I sometimes think that they try to act fine, I sent a text to him yesterday saying that he should stop and better man up. I don't like to hear her crying or see her in pain, I might hate her at some points because she can be annoying but so what? she's still my mom and I love her even if I don't tell that a lot. I feel really bad for her and I hope that they will be okay. I don't know whom to share my feelings to right now because I really feel empty sad and I feel like something bad is going to happen and God knows whats in my heart every time I pray. I ask him for everything he knows my desires even if I don't say it he can read my heart and mind. 

I feel shattered and I actually think I won't have that happy ending type of love story since he did those things to her... It made me change my perspective in love. I don't believe in such things anymore and I might end up alone and I don't really mind being alone as long as I have internet, a nice job... hopefully a lot of food!! Who need men when all they bring is pain and disaster and tons of lies? They just want to be laid and have fun and nothing else. I don't know why men do such things or maybe they're just sex craving animals. 

I don't think of him that way before but, maybe he is like that since they're old now and are bound to be together forever but... are they happy? I wish.