save me from this hell I am in
I have tried my best to not break down in front of my parents, teachers and classmates. But, every time I feel like crying? I just can't stop. I don't know maybe its because our parents doesn't understand the idea of technology and how it is used for school now and not just for entertainment and fun. Like for example. My course is Communication Arts which involves media and a ton of things related to it. And, I need the internet or the source of technology for it. I actually have to do this logo for my project but unfortunately I have no Photoshop in this computer and that means I can't do it here.
I have a lot of things at hand and I don't know which to do first... that includes household chores. I mean if you ask any first honor student they don't do anything but study. I mean look at them! I think they have the softest hand and has no problem in other things like taking care of their younger siblings or even doing their laundry? I do understand that it is my responsibility but the pressure handed to me.
Let's just say that my parents do compare me to my cousins who has the luxury of having their own rooms and not being disturbed by their other siblings or the fact that they don't wash their clothes and take care of their younger siblings because they are old enough and doesn't have younger siblings or the fact that they are the only child and is treated like a princess at home and has a ton of time to relax and do shit in their life. I mean I would love that little peace where you have your own room and NO ONE COULD ENTER IT! So that your mess would just be yours and their mess won't be blame on you because the last time I had my own bedroom they left their mess on my room and I felt devastated because I leave my room clean then when I come back its a mess... just because my mom does her things in my room acting like she doesn't have her own. Sometimes their mess becomes my mess. I mean my bed is not even used that much. I don't know. I always keep it tidy at night and I always keep the mess on my space only. So that they won't complain. The purpose I leave it on my place so that I would clean it before I sleep. I always do that. And, I think I always will. I put one dirt in one place and its going to stay there for a while but I swear I am going to clean it.
Having too much responsibility makes me want to ran away or have our own made again. But, having our own made makes me feel so guilty because I see them clean the house and I feel like I can do it too. Maybe, I would do household chores today and cram for school work tomorrow. FUCKMYLIFE
I have a lot of things at hand and I don't know which to do first... that includes household chores. I mean if you ask any first honor student they don't do anything but study. I mean look at them! I think they have the softest hand and has no problem in other things like taking care of their younger siblings or even doing their laundry? I do understand that it is my responsibility but the pressure handed to me.
Let's just say that my parents do compare me to my cousins who has the luxury of having their own rooms and not being disturbed by their other siblings or the fact that they don't wash their clothes and take care of their younger siblings because they are old enough and doesn't have younger siblings or the fact that they are the only child and is treated like a princess at home and has a ton of time to relax and do shit in their life. I mean I would love that little peace where you have your own room and NO ONE COULD ENTER IT! So that your mess would just be yours and their mess won't be blame on you because the last time I had my own bedroom they left their mess on my room and I felt devastated because I leave my room clean then when I come back its a mess... just because my mom does her things in my room acting like she doesn't have her own. Sometimes their mess becomes my mess. I mean my bed is not even used that much. I don't know. I always keep it tidy at night and I always keep the mess on my space only. So that they won't complain. The purpose I leave it on my place so that I would clean it before I sleep. I always do that. And, I think I always will. I put one dirt in one place and its going to stay there for a while but I swear I am going to clean it.
Having too much responsibility makes me want to ran away or have our own made again. But, having our own made makes me feel so guilty because I see them clean the house and I feel like I can do it too. Maybe, I would do household chores today and cram for school work tomorrow. FUCKMYLIFE
Comments
Post a Comment