I'M SCARED OF THE FUTURE.

Hello,

I have pondered upon my blockmates snapchat accounts and it frightened me and gave me the idea that someday I am going to look for a job, get interviewed and be scared. I have the fear that they will not care and that they would reject me. I don't even know anymore. I feel like I am going to be dead.

I am scared of adulting... I don't even know what I really want to do in life. I just want a decent job where I can do things and be organized and just follow around orders. I can be a secretary of someone who is busy. I would like that job, but as a student... I am scared. I feel like I would die.

Add to the fact that we need to work on a new thesis. I feel like giving up already. I don't even know anymore. I feel like dying, I wish the earth would just swallow me. I have the anxiety of being interviewed and answering things in a wrong way. I like doing calm things, I like jotting down notes and just being a chill kind of girl, I can do work under pressure but no so much. I have the fear of being well....

REJECTED.

But then again, life is full of rejections. I do hope that whatever God has planned for my future... everything will be okay.